In every aspect of living, we are given choices: stay on the ground when you get knocked down or get up; run away or stand and fight; love with forgiveness or hate with bitterness; laugh because you can or cry because you can’t find the good. There are many more, but you get the point. The choice isn’t always easy. Our biggest challenges we face are when life throws changes we didn’t plan on and we are given two choices: accept it or deny it. That’s the start of a chain reaction of choices.
No one wants to lose a loved one. I pray for those that do because more than likely, they had to watch a loved one suffer! Without question, hard to do!! The choices we are faced with when losing a loved one are just like every other situation in our lives, two choices at a time. One may lead to the next option, if there are still choices we have to make. Fate may present the situation, but, ultimately, we decide the actions we take in response. No two people will respond exactly the same either, and that is ok!
When I lost my son five years ago, I was faced with options, and yes, one decision presented me with another set of choices. I chose to continue to love my son, as opposed to being angry at him for his decision. I had to accept it was his decision to drink and drive. Then, I had to find a negative or a positive from that decision. I found a positive that no one else was hurt, that he didn’t know it was coming, and that he did not suffer (which many parents have had to witness their child do)! And then, I had to decide to die with him or live for him. I chose to live! I try to live the best life I can FOR him. He would not want it any other way. I also chose to find a positive every day that reflects a good life and a blessed life!
My son gave me several years of frustration, but there were many happy times that outweighed those moments by far. I still loved him every single day of it. He had to know it! The best way to measure the love you have for someone you have lost is to honor the life and moments you shared. Some deaths are of people you knew, acquaintances, friend of a friend. Many hit you at your core and you have to learn all new. A new way of getting up; a new way of going out; a new way of breathing each day; a new way of life. But still, two choices at a time.
I could really go on and on with this. Life does give you choices. We choose more options along the way than we can count, or even realize they are “choices.” I choose the positive for me every time I can. This goes for those situations I didn’t ask for and had no choice but to deal with… one choice at a time. With my son, I cry because he is gone, but I choose to smile because he was here!
#choices #gonebutnotforgotten #dontdrinkanddrive #thedashinthemiddle