As I sit here realizing this is the day you entered the world 33 years ago, I dwell on the fact that it is the ninth birthday we have celebrated your life with you in Heaven! And, we do celebrate you! My life is what it is because you added so much to it! Much to mourn, but much to celebrate! Don’t want to ever forget that!
So, what has happened since your last birthday? Lots! The world is still evolving. It reminds me of the summer of 2020 lately. Lots of words between people who just have words! The actions of others are still making my head spin while I wonder where common sense went! I can only imagine your reactions to certain aspects of this world! Your redneck nature would be shining through, no doubt!!
I can definitely see remnants of you in your niece and nephew!! Your sister sees it too and it makes her smile and cringe at the same time! She got her ears pierced for Christmas from Santa and she was so brave! Dread set in for her when she realized they were not using a piercing gun that would have been quick, nor were they using ice to numb the ear lobes, just rubbing alcohol and a needle! Through tears, she told the gal “Just do it!” and she did… one at a time! So proud of her!! I saw you in her that day for sure!! Her brother stood there supporting her and he would have made you proud too!!
Your sister was your biggest cheerleader and stills brags on you to her friends. I loved that you were friends as well as siblings! Yes, you got on each other’s nerves, but were the first to defend and protect each other! I’m pretty sure you kept me in the dark for each other’s protection. I can’t prove it, but I know it happened!
I’m still speaking on your behalf the first Tuesday of every month! Your message rings loud and clear! A lot of times, the participants have shed tears, but I truly believe that is a sign they see how their family might have been in my position because of that one decision. I tell them all I know that you did not intend this to be the outcome! I have the letter from the anonymous sender that told me you spoke to them and asked them to let us know you didn’t mean for this to happen and that you were sorry. One person’s one decision on one day and here we are, me writing you a letter on your birthday instead of baking a cake and buying a card! Your message I am telling over and over will never stop being told! Well, the path I was on took a turn here! Let’s get back to the fun things and milestones over the year.
You’ve missed so much here, but I know you are here in spirit, cheering us on each day! I know you have had several join you in Heaven, and though I am glad you are not alone, I am sorry so many are young like you! I’m not sure we get to put an age that does not seem too young, but the older I get, the younger they all seemed!
My intent is to not write a book each time I write you a letter, but that seems to be the end result! Just know we will be celebrating you today as we do everyday! You left a lot of stories, memories, and “Cody’isms”!in your 24 years. We have to pray they will sustain us until we join you! Until then, we will cry because you are gone, but smile because you were here!
Thinking and missing you on this 33rd birthday…
Love, Mom
#gonebutnotforgotten #forever24 #dontdrinkanddrive
thedashinthemiddle.com 